So I might just write this in English because I’m on Brice’s computer and there’s no A, A and O.. Swedish letters.. and there’s no such thing as annoying as trying to write something without them, or having to read something that people have written on keyboards without them and just put normal a’s and o’s instead.. I guess it’s because I can’t help but pronouncing it all wrong in my head, lol.

Just went for a toilet break. I hate Brice’s toilet because it’s such an echo in there, you hear everything that’s going on.. not even the smallest little fart can escape in there without the sound of it multiplying and sounding loud and clear in the rest of his apartment.. It’s the worst thing when I’m already in a situation as bad as this with my stomach, lol.. nothing to do about it though I guess.. If I have to go I have to go, and to be honest I get so happy every time I get to poop  that not even the fact that he can hear every second of it takes away the joy. So afraid of getting constipated..

Anyway I’ll move away from the shit stories now 🙂

This keyboard is so weird.. I wish I had brought my own computer but I totally forgot. I have too much to think about..

I wish I was sleeping atm but his bed is really killing my back. Even now it hurts though I’m sitting on his sofa instead. I’ve been out for a light jog every day of this week except yesterday and I wonder if that’s why my back is hurting now, because I didn’t do it… I desperately wanted to because I think it’s really hard to start a new habit like that so it’s probably pretty important that I do it every day, but I had to leave home at 6 in the morning yesterday for work so I couldn’t, and in the evening Brice came over before I had the chance to go out and I felt like it was really rude to leave the house for an hour when he was there.. It really bummed me out though, couldn’t get the thought out of my head.

I hope with all my heart that I’ll be able to continue with any kind of exercise next week as well, and hopefully forever of course but let’s not get ahead of ourselves now, if nothing else it helps clearing my mind. Waaay too much to think about.. Linnea leaving, all and every stomach issue that’s going on, school..  taking meds every day… guess I’ve been doing that for a long time now.. Think I started when I was 12 or so? So that’s almost 12 years by now. Kind of weird. Anyhow, mostly it’s only 3 tablets a day that I’ve been on, so that’s sorta okay to get over, but now with the cortisone I’ve been up to +10 a day. It’s depressing because it makes you feel like you’re really sick… I mean like a really sick, weak person that doesn’t have many days left of her life. Like I’m living on borrowed time. Though I appreciate how all this his making me treasure every day more, it’s also so stressful to feel like I’ve no idea how long my body is going to continue in this state, how long I’ll get to walk this earth.. Super dramatic thoughts I know but they’re there anyway.

I think I’ll finish this off now and maybe go poke Brice or whatever. There’s not much more to say about it that isn’t totally depressing. I’m glad it’s Saturday today, one free day of the week ◊ tomorrow it’s another pick up at the airport. God I hate it, will never do it again after tomorrow lol. Yesterday’s work was awful ^^ One great thing about it though is feeling the students excitement about getting to Japan, thinking back at how much fun I had here the first time and imagining all the sugoi experiences they’re going to have. It makes me really happy 🙂


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